All About Me.

-
I'm Emily and I'm a 22 year old who lives between Manchester and Nottingham as I'm training to be a Primary School Teacher.

 I've had problems with my periods since they started when I was 9 years old and eventually got a diagnosis of endometriosis in 2015.

 Most days living with endometriosis can be endless but I'm slowly learning how to be brave and strong whilst living with this everyday and through this blog I kinda hoping to be able to help others too.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The 5%

-
I never thought I’d be here, Thinking about this today. Back facing my worst fear, It’s back again they say. A 5% chance of return, That felt like nothing to me. The future felt like no concern, Now I find it hard to see. I never thought I’d be here, Experiencing this pain. The path ahead remains unclear, I’m not ready to do it again. A chance so small it felt unreal, My life was back on track. I don’t even know how I feel, That the endo could be back. I never thought I’d be here, Thinking about my choice. So in shock there are no tears, Finding it hard to use my voice. For now I want to just shut it all out, And pretend it’s all okay. But instead I’ve got to learn about, How I’m going to get through each day.
Read more

Maybe, Someday, Soon?

-
I wrote a poem to try and verbalise my thoughts following a year since my operation. I have this sort of feeling, A rumble in my gut. I know someday it will happen, Yet I am always saying but... But what if they do not like me, But what if they say not you? But what if we never have a family, But what if it is forever just us two? But what if I never become a mum, But what if I stay this sad? But what if I always feel completely numb, But what if my thoughts remain so bad? But what if I cannot bare to smile, But what if I struggle to think straight? But what if I am riddled with anxiety for a while, But what if I am always in a body I truly hate? I have this sort of feeling, A rumble in my gut. I know someday it will happen, Yet I am always saying but... But what if there is hope, around this dark and twisty bend, But what if one day, my broken heart will mend? But what if there is a child, waiting for my hand, But what if this was how my life, was always ...
Read more

Going Outside.

-
When we bought a new car, we suddenly saw it at every traffic light and in every car parking space.  The same thing happened when we found out I wouldn't be able to have a baby.  Suddenly every advert on the TV was about Aptamil follow on milk, every woman had a baby bump and every coffee shop was full of babies. It is beyond difficult and in truth I'm so jealous.  I look around and wish for a different future.  I mute the TV and change the channel.  I put my head down in the supermarket and go down a different aisle.  I have to leave coffee shops mid drink.  I struggle going outside. I'm struggling.  The future is so uncertain and the date for the hysterectomy looms closer.  I don't know if we will ever be lucky enough to have a family.  I don't know how many more times I can keep crying in public.  I don't know how many more times I'll be able to keep going outside without feeling totally consumed by it all. I pu...
Read more