Emily & Endometriosis.

I've been a bit MIA on this blog recently. I've had some shit news from the doctor and it feels like it has all come crashing down around me but I guess now I'm ready to share. So... I need to have a hysterectomy.  Yep, that's right.  At the ripe old age of 22 a hysterectomy is my only option left.  Endometriosis, adenomyosis and polycystic ovaries have officially done so much damage to my body that nothing else will work or has worked over the past 13 years. So here I am on a Saturday morning trying to price up the cost of surrogacy and egg freezing.  At 22 years old.  Oh and by the way, if anyone has a spare £20,000+ knocking about all donations are welcome.   Yep, that's roughly how much this is all going to cost. I normally don't want pity or for you to feel sorry for me.  But, this fucked up chronic illness has changed that.  I want you to feel sorry for me because I'm never going to be able to carry my own child and I want you t...

Truthfully, I do struggle to find happiness sometimes.  I often have 'down days' where I suffer massively and panic about absolutely everything.  I've been battling with anxiety and depression for a few years and often speak about the importance of talking about mental health but until now I've been extremely ashamed about being open about my struggles because, in truth, I know other people have it much worse than I do. I've lived with chronic, debilitating pain for 13 years and until around a year ago I never really understood what was going on.  I was often told by doctors and even those who are close to me that this pain was all in my head and I simply needed to get on with it.  I even started to believe that there was absolutely nothing wrong and they were right, this was all in my head. I'm not ready to talk about my personal battle with anxiety and depression because right now it's too difficult but I'm hoping that it opens the door f...

So here goes, I am about to put myself out there.  This isn't really something that I normally do.   But I am 1 in 10. I am 1 in 10 women who suffer daily with endometriosis and have decided that after 13 years enough is enough and I want to help others with endometriosis.  I've been blogging secretly for almost a month and have finally decided today is the day.  The first day of Endometriosis Awareness Week 2018.  So please check out my blog and help spread the word that heavy, painful periods aren't normal and neither is waiting 8 years for a diagnosis.

So as I have previously admitted I am absolutely no expert on adenomyosis but I'm just going to write a quick blog post about what I have found out so far! So what actually is adenomyosis?  So adenomyosis is often referred to as the sister of endometriosis.  It is a condition where the the cells of the womb's lining grow into the uterus muscle.  It can occur in any one who has periods but is actually most common in women who have had children or those aged between 40 and 50 years old.  I struck lucky on that one then.. Like endometriosis, no one really knows why adenomyosis occurs. It has similar symptoms to endometriosis, which include: heavy periods painful periods pain during sex bleeding between periods tiredness and dizziness I experience all of those symptoms from my endometriosis, so it is hard to distinguish between the two and is a possible reason as to why it has only just been discovered.  (Alongside my old consultant not actually b...

I'm no newbie on the whole surgery front.  I've just had my seventh operation and know it isn't quite the end yet. Whilst the majority of my surgeries have been pre-planned, I have had a few emergency surgeries.    Having surgeries in a total of 4 hospitals around the country. "You've had so many operations, it must be so easy now!" No, no it's not.  I've had surgeries several hours long, have extreme scarring on my stomach, had an anaphylactic shock during recovery, had to have a catheter and stay in a hospital for up to five nights.  I also had a severe phobia of needles and used to faint every time I got my blood taken - I have very small and hiding veins so also suffered from many cannulas that ejected!  Once it took 11 attempts to reinsert the cannula! This is some of the scarring on my stomach.  As you can see, I still had all the glue from my seventh surgery in my belly button. With each surgery the risks get ...

As part of living with endometriosis, I also live with chronic pain.  More often then not, this happens daily. I'm writing this post as I'm curled up on the sofa with a hot water bottle and dosed up on Mefenamic Acid and Nortriptyline, I have just come back from a night away where my pain was so unbearable that I was screaming in pain and sat on the toilet with intense sickness and diarrhoea.    I take a minimum of 11 pain relief medications every single day and can find that I need to just sleep, lie in bed and cry the pain out.  Not a sympathy comment, just the daily realities of endometriosis. Here is a body map that shows where my pain occurs.   As you can see, it's spread all over my body.  The pain dominates my left side and can be so severe that I struggle to sit up or even walk a small distance.  Endometriosis truly controls my life.  The pain causes such severe anxiety.  I constantly worry what people th...

Here is my endometriosis timeline.. 2005 I was the unfortunate one who started my periods before the primary school even installed sanitary bins.  I thought I was dying, I didn't even know periods existed at 9 years old!!  I certainly didn't know that having almost a week off every month due to heavy bleeding and extreme pain wasn't the norm! 2009 My parents took me to my first gynaecologist!  I honestly can't really remember much but I remember starting the pill at just 13.  I had my first ever laparoscopy but no endometriosis was found!  I was given some pain relief and just kinda told to get on with it. 2011 I went and saw a new gynaecologist.  This time I was given some a different pill and some pain medication.  I had a hysteroscopy and again, no endometriosis!  They fitted a mirena coil and again was just told to see how it goes! 2014 Everything was going so well!  It was a miracle!  Then i got rushed to hospital a...